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Chewbacca Stories: I Didn’t Want to be Rude


Today’s Chewbacca Story isn’t a recent one; it happened a couple of months ago, but I felt it was worth sharing.

To be more precise, this story happened in June. I had gotten some free tickets to go watch the Montreal Impact host the Rochester Rhinos at Saputo Stadium in Montreal. It was a very sunny and hot day, perfect to soak in a good soccer game. The Impact tied the game but anyway, that’s not the story I’m telling today.

This was during the 2010 Fifa World Cup and when I went to work the next Friday and Chewbacca was there, I wanted to tease him a bit about Italy being eliminated from the tournament.

“Hey, so what happened to the Italians? They’re supposed to be defending champions, no?” I asked.

“Yeah I know, I was going to say but I changed my mind.”

“Um, what are you talking about Chewie?”

“I was at the game and I saw you.”

“What game?” I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about, and this time it was me who said; “I don’t understand…”

“You were at the game, and so was I. I saw you there.”

“Dude the game was in South Africa.”

“The game was here in Montreal, since when does the Impact go play in South Africa?”

“Oh the Impact game, OK, now I get it, where were you sitting?”

“I was sitting three rows below you; I saw that you almost caught that ball that went out of bounds.”

“Wow, sorry, I didn’t even notice you. Why didn’t you say hi?”

“I was going to but I changed my mind.”

“You said that already, but why did you change your mind?”

“I didn’t want to be rude.”

“Rude about what?”

“Well I didn’t want to bother you because you were obviously there on a date. But your girlfriend is working in France right now. So I did the math and realized you were cheating on your girlfriend with an ugly girl. But that’s OK, its up to you if you want to cheat with ugly girls, at least you took her to a good game. It was fun, they won 4-0.”

“OK, Chewie. That girl you saw me with, I wasn’t cheating on my girlfriend with her. She’s my sister. And they tied the game 1-1 just so you know.”

“Oh she’s your sister? I was wondering what she was doing with an ugly guy like you. Now that I think of it, it makes sense for two ugly people to be related. What doesn’t make sense is that you bring your sister to a game. You should only bring dates to games. Your sister is like a small version of your mom, she’s supposed to make you food and do your laundry.”

“Yeah, OK, Chewie, and you wonder why you can’t keep a girlfriend.”

“It has nothing to do with it, they leave because they feel I’m too smart for them, it’s not for nothing I did an extra year of high school. And I don’t know what game you were watching because I was there and Montreal won 4-0.”

So at this point I was kind of upset and didn’t want to deal with him anymore. I decided to go load the truck for the deliveries I would have that night. But first I had to do one thing; I found the score of the game, showed him that they did in fact tie the game. I also told him that from now if he doesn’t want to be rude, he should just shut up and that I was sorry for asking why he didn’t say hi at the game.

When I left I heard him say to himself;

“Why is he upset, it doesn’t make sense.”

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4 comments on “Chewbacca Stories: I Didn’t Want to be Rude

  1. For the record… i was HUNGOVER!! I am
    not THAT ugly lol.

    Like

  2. Dunno if you intended it or not but that is probably the funniest thing I’ve read all day. I could never work with this man. I’d get brought up on murder charges before the first week was out.

    Like

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